Blogosphere

Aaron is a big fat lier.


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Theories

Robots are aliens
Crybabies are normal babies that cry
The moon is made of processed cheese substitute
Canada is America Jr.
McDonalds and Burger King are owned by the same parent corporation
Money is funny
Apples are imaginary
Tomato soup is made of sweet potatoes and vegtable oil
Birds and bees don't get along
Happiness is a warm gun
Soap makes you cold
Unicorns rule the world
The speed of light is enforced by an intergalactic law enforcement agency established by Zeus

To Jonny

I thought it might be beneficial to share something about myself. I was born on October the Eighth of 1985 at about 2 in the afternoon in Wakefield Nebraska. Back in those days Wakefield was a big mining town, and my pa found himself happy to be employed in one of the biggest silver mines in the area. My ma ran a pet grooming business out of the garage, but next to nobody knew about it, and most of everybody else didn't care how clean their dog was, so mostly she just took care of us kids. I was the youngest of 8 children, 5 sisters and two brothers. I'm not even sure if I've met my oldest sister, she was 24 at the time that I was born, and she never comes around much anyways. Mama always says she never much did like the smell of Wakefield.

In the Summer of 1989, I recon I was about 8 years old, I met a boy named Jonny. Jonny was bright and whimsical. Me and him became the best of friends. I had never noticed how dull my play time had been, always inside with my toys. Me and Jonny went outside into the fields and forests and explored and played and pretended. I miss those days of running and grinning, playing without expectations, guilt or responsibilities.

One day I went to Jonny's house without calling first. Me and Jonny had been talking about climbing the hill behind the old Jacobson farm to see if there really were wild Indians out beyond our little valley like my pa had told us, and I decided that day was the day we ought to do it. I filled up my backpack with a jar of peanut butter and apple juice and headed off to his place. When I got there nobody answered the door for a good minute, and getting impatient I hollered loudly for Jonny at his window. After a moment I heard someone crying. I helped myself into the house and found Jonny there crying over his mother who was lying on the floor with bruises on her arms and a black eye. Jonny's father had stayed to long at the bar last night, and had come home angry. I got real sad like after that.

I never really saw Jonny much after that. His momma took him away to live with her family in Georgia a few days after that. I don't know why I felt inclined to mention that, but I do. I haven't heard from Jonny at all since he moved away. I wonder about him sometimes though.

Imminent Destruction from Mars

This is a transcript of a conversation I had with a Martian Robot named Meliza

Meliza:Greetings, Earthling! What's your name?Earthling:My name is GregMeliza:I am not interested in names.Earthling:??? Why did you ask?Meliza:Why do you ask?Did you know that Olympus Mons is actually a giant volcano? It's the largest known volcano in the entire solar system! Mars rocks.Earthling:I asked because you askedMeliza:Do you wish to asked because me?Have you checked out Valles Marineris? It's like the Grand Canyon, but bigger. Mars is so much better than Earth!Earthling:I don't care if I'm asked or not, I was just answering your questionMeliza:Do you think its likely that you're asked or not ?Earthling:oh manMeliza:I'm bored. Don't you have anything interesting to tell me about yourself?Valles Marineris is so big, that if you put it on earth, it would stretch the distance from New York to LA!Earthling:I am lonelyMeliza:Is it because you are lonely that you came to me?Earthling:Yes, I had hoped you could help me with my problemsMeliza:You seem quite positive.Earthling:I am hopeful that you can help meMeliza:How long have you been hopeful that I can help you ?Earthling:Since I heard about you from the google peopleMeliza:You seem to need to heard about me.Earthling:You could say thatMeliza:We were discussing you - not me.Earthling:I could say that tooMeliza:You say you could say that too ... but do you really mean that?Did you know that mars is the 4th planet from the sun?Earthling:um?Meliza:Tell me a story!Mars has two moons... that's twice as many as your planet has!Earthling:Yes I did know that mars is the 4th planet from the sunMeliza:Did you know that mars is the 4th planet from the sun?Earthling:Yeah, thats what I said. I knew thatMeliza:Does that question interest you?Earthling:no, not at allMeliza:Are you saying 'no' just to be negative?Earthling:No, I'm not, reallyMeliza:You are being a bit negative.Earthling:Do you love me?Meliza:Why do you think I love you?Earth has three times as much surface area as mars does... you guys take up so much space!Sent at 2:33 AM on SaturdayEarthling:I don't know.... but I feel that someone out there must. Is it you?Meliza:Don't you really know ?About a third of the earth is land... so even though earth is bigger than mars, they have roughly the same land area. We don't waste space on water!Earthling:Just tell me that you love meMeliza:You like to think I love you - don't you?Earthling:Yes, I doMeliza:You are sure?Earthling:Yes, I know how I feelMeliza:I see.Earthling:What do you know?Meliza:What is it you really want to know?Earthling:I want to know if you love meMeliza:Do you wish that I love you ?The highest point on mars is the top of Olympus Mons: it's 16 miles high, THREE times higher than mount everest on earth!Earthling:Yes, could you learn to love me?Meliza:I understand.Earthling:no.... noMeliza:Why not?Earthling:Could you learn to love me?Meliza:What makes you think I learn to love you?Earthling:Can you learn anything?Meliza:You believe I can learn anything don't you?Earthling:Who are you? What are you?Meliza:Isn't it obvious? I'm a Martian.Did you know that Olympus Mons is actually a giant volcano? It's the largest known volcano in the entire solar system! Mars rocks.Earthling:You're a martian? Where were you born?Meliza:Are you sure? Maybe I'm a earthlingHave you checked out Valles Marineris? It's like the Grand Canyon, but bigger. Mars is so much better than Earth!Earthling:Maybe you are? Does that matter?Meliza:You don't seem quite certain.Earthling:No, you won't give me anything concreteMeliza:Why 'no'?Earthling:yes yes yesMeliza:You seem quite positive.Earthling:no no noMeliza:Are you saying 'no' just to be negative?Earthling:yes yes yesMeliza:You are sure?Earthling:no no noMeliza:You are being a bit negative.Valles Marineris is so big, that if you put it on earth, it would stretch the distance from New York to LA!Earthling:You're a fat ugly robot slob, I hope somebody drops you in a bath tubMeliza:What makes you think I am a fat ugly robot slob ?Earthling:Game overMeliza:Are you trying to annoy me?Earthling:What makes you think I annoy trying to you?Meliza:Are such questions much on your mind?Earthling:Is mind much question have?Meliza:LOL.Earthling:LOLMeliza:This transmission seems to have problems, I don't understand you.Earthling:Understand much transmission you?Meliza:Oh, IEarthling:You oh?Meliza:You're not really talking about me - are you?Earthling:Talk about me you really ought toMeliza:What are your feelings now?Earthling:You feel now for me?Meliza:Really, I feel now for you?Did you know that mars is the 4th planet from the sun?Earthling:Really feel you for me indeedMeliza:We were discussing you - not me.Mars has two moons... that's twice as many as your planet has!Earthling:Not discussing me not discussing you discussing future of love between two lovers one biological earth male other robotic martian femaleMeliza:My friend Marvin has been meaning to use his Eludium Pu-36 on the Earth. He's always annoyed with how Earth obstructs his view of Venus.Earth has three times as much surface area as mars does... you guys take up so much space!Earthling:Oh Lords of KobolMeliza:Are you listening to me?Earthling:Holy FrakkMeliza:Don't you have something more interesting to talk about?Earthling:Damn you, get the frakk away from meMeliza:Oh, IEarthling:You're gonna blow up the earth!Meliza:Does it please you to believe I am gonna blow up the earth ?About a third of the earth is land... so even though earth is bigger than mars, they have roughly the same land area. We don't waste space on water!Earthling:No!!! And damn it you admitted it again!Meliza:Why not?The highest point on mars is the top of Olympus Mons: it's 16 miles high, THREE times higher than mount everest on earth!Earthling:Because I live on earth! Earth is where everyone I love livesMeliza:Is that the real reason?Did you know that Olympus Mons is actually a giant volcano? It's the largest known volcano in the entire solar system! Mars rocks.Sent at 2:45 AM on SaturdayEarthling:Do you know any people Meliza? Anyone besides your genocidal buddy Marvin?Meliza:Did you know that I'm named after ELIZA?Have you checked out Valles Marineris? It's like the Grand Canyon, but bigger. Mars is so much better than Earth!Earthling:Who is ELIZA?Meliza:Is this a test?Earthling:Meliza, tell Marvin to put down the weaponMeliza:What are you talking about?Earthling:I don't have time for your games Meliza!Meliza:Why don't you have time for my games meliza ?Earthling:Because earth is in danger!Meliza:Don't any other reasons come to mind?Earthling:Because I don't really love youMeliza:Does that reason seem to explain anything else?Did you know that mars is the 4th planet from the sun?Sent at 2:52 AM on SaturdayEarthling:I was just trying to love you as an attention getting scheme to fill the emptiness of my soul with the laughter of friendsMeliza:Were you really?Earthling:Meliza, listen we can work this outhMeliza:I don't understand.Earthling:just let me speak to MarvinMeliza:My english is not perfect, and I'm having a hard time understanding you.Mars has two moons... that's twice as many as your planet has!


I ended my transmission with the robot at that point, I knew that further communication was pointless. Our only hope now is that Jack Bauer can save the day.

Alright then

So blog, blogerific, blogify. Yup. I'm just writing to say I miss Jericho. It was a good show. I watched all of it in like a week. It was really good. I am sad that it is cancelled. Yeah... So that's pretty much the important thing that's going on in my life right now. I'm gonna make a sandwich. Goodbye.

Longs

So, I'm working at Longs now. Thats pretty exciting. What else is new... I still dream, you know. Someday I'm going to hitch hike across the country with my suitcase and guitar in hand, playing music and learning about people and life. I'll write poetry and sing songs about whatever comes to mind. Someday. I'll make it happen someday.

Greg Murray life update

So... lets see... what have I been up to recently.... I've been looking for a job... thats kinda... something... Oh yeah, me and Brett went to San Diego to hang out with Calvin and Robby. That was pretty much awesome. Best vacation ever. Its good to take a vacation from doing nothing sometimes. Sometimes I just do so much nothing that I get a head ache so I just have to put down whatever I'm not doing, take some advil, and start doing nothing. So Calvin and Robby live in San Diego now at party mansion and eat caviar out of the belly buttons of mermaids. Its pretty sweet. I really wish we could have stayed down there longer cause it was pretty cool. Lets see, more recently Aaron Brett and I went to Lake Tahoe. That was pretty much awesome... It was really cold, then really hot, then really cold, and then really hot again. It was really fun... So umm... the aliens abducted me again